Why Narcissists Would Not Marry Their New Supply

Narcissists are individuals who prioritize their own needs and desires above all else, often at the expense of others. When it comes to marriage, their motivations are significantly different from the typical couple. Their primary focus is on personal gain and the benefits they can derive from a relationship, rather than romantic commitment or long-term partnership.

Marriage for Personal Gain, Not Commitment

Marriage is not an end goal for a narcissist; it is merely a means to an end. They only marry if it offers them substantial benefits over being single. This could include providing a place to live, gaining access to wealth or status, or simply avoiding social stigma. Even when they do marry, it is often conditional and driven by their own interests.

Why They Turn Their Back on Their New Supply

When a narcissist introduces their new 'supply' (someone who is being exploited for personal gain), they would not marry this person. This is because the new supply serves to keep their options open and maintain their psychological flexibility. Unlike a lifelong commitment, the relationship with a new supply is shallow and transactional.

The new supply is treated as a temporary asset, much like a resource that can be discarded or replaced. It may take weeks, months, or even years for the new victim to realize the true nature of the relationship. They are often overly optimistic and believe that the narcissist truly values them. This irrational optimism stems from the narcissist's love bombing period, which is designed to manipulate and build false hope.

Maintaining Control and Avoiding Responsibility

Narcissists seek to manipulate their partners and maintain control over them. Once the initial love bombing phase ends, they test the partner's commitment and boundaries. If the partner fails this test by showing a lack of tolerance or setting boundaries that cannot be crossed, the narcissist sees them as no longer useful.

Narcissists are inherently insecure and do not trust their partners to remain devoted. They use their partners as expendable resources, discarding them when they are no longer profitable. Long-term partners are seen as backups, while the narcissist engages in multiple relationships to fulfill their own desires. This behavior is a manifestation of their inability to form true emotional connections or to take responsibility for their actions.

The Importance of Controllability and Trust

Narcissists prefer partners who are easy to control and manipulate. Over time, if a partner demonstrates unwavering commitment, showing they will not tolerate abuse or boundary violation, the narcissist will see them as no longer useful. Long-term relationships are viewed as a burden and a constraint, rather than a mutually beneficial partnership.

Conclusion

In summary, narcissists avoid marrying their new supply because such a relationship provides no long-term benefits and lacks the flexibility they need to achieve their personal goals. Instead, they look for partners who can be easily discarded, keeping their options open and maintaining the illusion of control. Understanding these dynamics is crucial for recognizing and protecting oneself from narcissistic manipulation.