Strategies for Dealing with a Narcissist Ex After Months of Rejection

If you've been in a relationship with a narcissist and they've discarded you for months, it's understandable that you might feel a mix of sadness, anger, and even a desire for revenge. However, the most effective way to handle such a situation is to go no contact. This method can significantly harm a narcissist, as they thrive on validation, attention, and admiration.

Understanding Narcissistic Behavior and Their Motivations

Narcissists often seek attention and control, which fuels their self-esteem. The best form of revenge, therefore, is to become a ghost. By ceasing all communication, you render them insignificant and, as a result, unimportant. This can be a powerful form of psychological warfare because narcissists naturally crave this kind of validation and attention. Without it, their ego takes a hit, and their self-esteem suffers.

Why Reaching Out Is Not the Solution

Attempting to make your ex-narcissist feel guilty by yelling or writing them about how they've hurt you is a mistake. Such behaviors are precisely what they want, as they thrive on drama and attention. If you write to their new partner or confront them in any way, you're giving them what they desperately seek: your attention. Instead, focus on moving on and healing yourself.

Handling Face-to-Face Encounters

Even if you have to share parenting duties with a narcissist or see them in public, the key is to act as if you don't even know them. Treat them with indifference, as if you've forgotten all the bad things they did to you. Indifference can be a powerful tool, making them feel hurt, insecure, or even leading to a breakdown. This can be your way of revenge, and it doesn't require you to be mean to them.

If you must interact, focus on business. Keep the conversation brief and to the point. Stick to the facts and avoid sharing your feelings. For example, you could say, "I don't remember what you mean but we need to talk about our kid's ballet lesson. You have to be on time for that. I'll be in France for the next lesson so it would really help if you could take her. Thanks! Hope you're having a great day." This way, you keep the conversation professional and under control.

Additional Resources for Understanding Narcissistic Behavior

For more insights into dealing with narcissistic behavior, you might find the following articles helpful:

7 Weird Phone Habits of a Narcissist 4 Things to Never Say to a Narcissist 5 Weird Eating Habits of a Narcissist 5 Toxic Money Habits of a Narcissist 10 Narcissist's Nonverbal Abuse Tactics 7 Weird Facial Expressions of a Narcissist 8 Clear Signs You're Being Used, Not Loved

These articles offer a wealth of information to help you better understand and deal with narcissistic behavior.

Conclusion

The best revenge against a narcissist is to distance yourself completely and let them experience the feeling of insignificance. By going no contact, you redirect their attention-seeking behaviors back onto them, forcing them to confront their unhealthy need for validation and attention. This can be a painful experience for them, ultimately leading to a more balanced and healthier approach to life.