Is It Weird to Have No Support Network in Your 30s?

Does the idea of having a support network ever feel strange to you, especially if you are in your 30s? Let's explore the concept of independence and the nuances of forming a support network in this stage of life.

True Independence

For many, the notion of not having a strong support network in one's 30s is not perceived as strange. As someone who has navigated through the years independently, my experience aligns with the view that a solitary support structure can be perfectly fine. At 51, I can attest to the belief that being self-reliant has not hindered my success or happiness. To me, the core of support is primarily 'me myself and I.' This self-reliant mindset has not come with any problems; in fact, it has fostered a sense of integrity and confidence.

The Human Condition: Trust and Authenticity

Another layer of this discussion revolves around the reliability of human connections. The reality is, trust is often a significant factor in building a support network. As many have observed, humans are prone to being untrustworthy and often narcissistic. This reality serves as a deterrent for developing external support structures, promoting the idea that one can be more secure with just oneself.

The Value of Self-Trust and Authenticity

When the only person you can truly rely on is yourself, it becomes a cornerstone of trust and authenticity. The assurance that comes from self-reliance cannot be easily matched. Knowing that your interests and well-being are genuinely of utmost importance to yourself adds a sense of stability and comfort. Many find that this self-reliant approach removes the risks associated with relying on others, such as betrayal or manipulation. In a sense, self-reliance can be a safer and more reliable choice than relying on potentially unreliable individuals.

Virtual Connections and Online Friendships

Owing to the advent of the internet, many people have found solace in virtual connections. Social media platforms like TikTok, Snapchat, Facebook, and Instagram have provided a space for fake friendships and social interactions that can sometimes feel more authentic than real-life ones. The convenience of spending time alone or engaging in online activities can indeed be a valid reason to prefer these connections over real-life interactions. However, this approach also raises questions about the depth and quality of these relationships.

Why a Support Network is Important

While it is possible to thrive without a traditional support network, it is crucial to consider the nuances. Losing friends over the years, as some might experience due to life changes like marriage or relocation, is a natural part of life. Additionally, as individuals go through significant changes in their 30s, new interests and tastes might lead to a reevaluation of friendships. However, maintaining a connection with family members can provide emotional and practical support, which might be underutilized or overlooked. Interactions or even just exchanges of information with family members can significantly enhance one's well-being and offer a sense of belonging.

Building a Support Network

For those who feel the need to strengthen their support systems, taking proactive steps can be beneficial. Reaching out to old friends, volunteering for causes you care about, learning new skills, joining a gym, or participating in community activities can provide opportunities to meet and connect with others. These actions not only build a support network but also enrich one's life with new experiences and perspectives.

In conclusion, the idea of having no support network is not inherently absurd, especially in the light of self-reliance and the nuances of human connections. While the internet offers a convenient substitute for real friendships, maintaining authentic connections and a support network can greatly enhance one's well-being. Whether one chooses to rely solely on themselves or build a network of genuine connections is a highly personal decision that should be made based on individual circumstances and needs.