Navigating Friendships as an Aspergic/Autistic Teenager

Forming friendships can be particularly challenging for individuals on the autism spectrum, especially during the adolescent years. As a teenager with Asperger's or autism, it's natural to feel uncertain about how to make and maintain friendships. This article aims to guide you through the process, emphasizing the unique aspects of how you interact with others and what you can do to foster meaningful relationships.

Understanding Your Autistic Perspective

Autistic individuals often have a distinct way of viewing the world, which may influence how they approach social interactions. In some cases, making friends may seem more complicated because the typical social cues and conventions do not come naturally. Here are a few insights into the autistic mind and how you can navigate these challenges:

Conversations with Autistic Individuals

Autistic people may have differing levels of communication, and understanding these differences is key to successful interactions. Some high-functioning autistic individuals might engage in conversations with normal, correct English, though they might not use inflection or speak in a formal tone. Others may try to fit in by adhering strictly to societal norms, while still others might consistently tie conversations back to their interests or imagination. For instance, you might spend hours talking to a young autistic man about topics ranging from a petting zoo to nuclear physics, all under the guise of a spaceship theme.

Non-Verbal Communication and Unique Body Language

Non-verbal and semi-verbal individuals may use body language to communicate, which can be uniquely personal. Paying close attention to these cues is essential, as observing and understanding these patterns can help you connect with them more effectively. It's also important to be aware of your own body language, as autistic individuals can often pick up on non-verbal signals and may read your intentions accurately.

Perceptiveness and Sensitivity

Be sensitive to the comfort levels of others. Some autistic individuals may not be comfortable with prolonged social interaction or may prefer to communicate in more structured ways. If you notice that their comfort level is decreasing, it may be best to politely end the conversation or suggest a break. Being attuned to these signs can prevent discomfort and preserve the relationship's quality.

Strategies for Building Friendships

Building friendships can be enhanced by engaging in activities that you and others share a passion for. Here are some practical steps to help you form meaningful relationships:

Join Schools Clubs or After-School Activities

Your school likely offers various clubs or after-school groups that focus on different interests. Joining these can provide opportunities to interact with like-minded individuals. Take the initiative to talk to others at these events, and engage in discussions about the topics that interest you. This can help open doors to friendly interactions and eventually, meaningful friendships.

Find Common Interests

Spot individuals who share your interests and actively engage with them. Observe the conversations and people around you to identify these opportunities. Be an active listener, and when you have knowledge about a topic, contribute thoughtfully. However, if you notice that someone is dismissive or uninterested in your contributions, it might be a sign to conclude the interaction tactfully.

Building friendships as an autistic teenager requires patience, awareness, and flexibility. By understanding how you process social interactions and taking concrete steps to engage with others, you can develop meaningful connections that enrich your life during this challenging but important phase.