Can You Be MGTOW If You Are Married?

The concept of MGTOW (Men Going Their Own Way) is centered around the idea of personal autonomy and freedom from the perceived constraints and pressures imposed by society, particularly by Women. If you are married, does this mean you cannot be a part of the MGTOW movement? This article explores the intricacies and nuances of this question.

Understanding MGTOW

The foundation of MGTOW is rooted in the belief that men should have control over their lives and roles, free from the expectations and toxic influences often associated with women's influence. While being married can involve a shared life with a partner, the extent to which MGTOW principles can be accommodated varies.

MGTOW is an outgrowth of the Men's Rights Movement (MRM) and Men's Rights Activism (MRA). The MGTOW movement rejects social constructions and expectations of masculinity, particularly those imposed by feminism. For MGTOW adherents, the aim is to define themselves according to their own terms, rejecting what they see as oppressive societal norms and seeking to live independently and freely.

Can a Married Man Be MGTOW?

The answer to this question is not straightforward. While technically, a married man cannot be MGTOW in the strictest sense, as his wife has a significant say, a married man can still incorporate MGTOW concepts into his life. Let us explore different perspectives:

The Technical Perspective

From a technical standpoint, being married automatically disqualifies a man from being MGTOW. MGTOW inherently requires an individual to be the ultimate arbiter of their own life, and marriage involves shared decision-making. A married man cannot be the sole decision-maker, as his spouse has an equal say in important life decisions.

Example: A married man cannot be MGTOW if he cannot make decisions about his life without consulting his wife. This constraint defeats the core principle of MGTOW.

The Purpose of MGTOW

MGTOW is about empowering men to live freely and independently. If a married man is already following MGTOW principles and valuing his personal autonomy, he can still align with the broader goals of the movement. However, the strict definition of MGTOW typically assumes a single and independent lifestyle.

Example: An MRA (Men's Rights Activist) or Masculinist can support MGTOW ideals even if they are married. They can advocate for MGTOW and be prepared to adopt the lifestyle if their marriage does not align with their values.

The Legal and Social Perspective

In many western countries, married individuals have significant legal authority and responsibilities towards each other. This shared authority further complicates the idea of a married man living fully in line with MGTOW principles. However, if a man's wife is subservient and allows him to make household decisions and accept a traditional role, he could be considered MGTOW in practice.

Example: A man who has a highly submissive wife can still be MGTOW in practice, as she does not exert significant control over his life.

Case Study: An MGTOW Approach to Marriage

Consider the case of a 60-year-old man who is married and has incorporated MGTOW principles into his life:

This man has devoted his efforts to educating his son about the importance of maintaining independence and avoiding traditional partnership structures. His son is taught to focus on personal freedom and not getting married or forming long-term relationships, with the idea that boys should stay single to enjoy their independence.

From a broader perspective, the movement acknowledges the complex dynamics of relationships. It does not necessarily rule out marriage outright but raises questions about the authenticity and alignment of marital relationships with individual values and life goals.

Conclusion and Final Thoughts

The question of whether a married man can be MGTOW is complex and context-dependent. From a technical and strict definition, marriage disqualifies a man from being MGTOW. However, in practical terms, a married man can still incorporate MGTOW principles into his life, provided his spouse allows him significant independence and does not exert undue control.

Ultimately, the real goal of MGTOW is to foster a lifestyle that aligns with the values of personal autonomy and freedom. If a man's marriage does not hinder these values, he can still draw inspiration and alignment from the MGTOW movement.

In the end, the essence of MGTOW is about living a life according to one's terms, and this can be achieved even in the midst of a partnership or marriage. The journey of living MGTOW is as much about the choices one makes and the paths one chooses as it is about the marital status.