How to Respond When Someone Wants to Know You

When someone reaches out to say, “I want us to know each other,” it can be a thrilling and exciting situation—especially if they have caught your interest. Here’s how to navigate this interaction in a way that respects their intentions and clarifies your own boundaries and desires.

Understanding the Situation

Before you respond, it's important to assess your feelings and the context of the request. Is their intention genuine, or does it seem insincere? Are you open to getting to know them better, or would it be a strain on your time and energy?

Positive Reactions

If you feel positively inclined towards this person and are open to getting to know them, a friendly and excited response can be delightful. Embrace the positivity and express your eagerness to spend time together:

"Oh how cute! Well I always like it when someone wants to get to know me better. Let’s chat and see where it leads!"

This response not only acknowledges their request but also opens the door to further interaction. Ensure that you still take the time to consider and decide if such an interaction aligns with your personal goals and boundaries.

Negative Reactions

On the other hand, if your initial reaction is that you’re not interested, it's crucial to handle the situation delicately. Make your response clear, honest, and kind to avoid causing confusion or hurt:

"I appreciate your ambition. But for us to get to know each other, we would have to spend a lot of time together and I don't want to do that. I think you need to find someone else who is interested in spending that kind of time."

By being clear and direct, you avoid leading them on and prevent potential misunderstanding or frustration. It's always better to be truthful and respectful of their feelings.

Neutral Reactions

If you feel neutral or ambivalent, it’s important to engage with the person and learn more about their intentions. Ask clarifying questions to understand what they mean by “getting to know each other.” This can help you decide whether to pursue a deeper connection or maintain a casual relationship:

"Ok.. let’s talk. I mean you can ask whatever you want and I’m pretty open about most things but you might want to start off in the shallow end of the pool before you dive into the deep end.. if you catch my drift."

These questions invite them to elaborate on their intentions and can lead to a more meaningful conversation. It's a way to gauge their level of interest and your own level of openness.

Reflecting on Your Feelings

Before responding, take some time to reflect on your true feelings and consider the person's statement carefully. They might be looking for a deeper connection or simply engaging in a casual conversation. Understanding your own comfort level can help you respond appropriately.

Final Thoughts

When a person reaches out with “I want us to know each other,” it’s a signal that they value an opportunity to get to know you. Regardless of your response, ensure it’s honest, respectful, and clarifies the direction of your relationship. Whether you choose to pursue a deeper connection or keep things at a surface level, the key is to handle the situation with kindness and openness.

Jessica Wang