How to Determine if Someone You Met Online Is a Good Person

Determining if someone you meet online is a 'good' person can be challenging, but there are several steps you can take to assess their character and relational fitness.

Communication Style

Communication is a key indicator of character. Pay attention to how he communicates. Is he respectful, kind, and attentive? Does he listen to you and engage in meaningful conversations? A person who communicates well and respectfully is more likely to be trustworthy.

Consistency

Consistency is crucial. Look for consistency in his words and actions. Does he follow through on what he says? Inconsistent behavior can be a red flag, indicating that he may not be reliable or sincere.

Ask Questions

Get to know him better through conversation. Ask about his values, interests, and life experiences. A good person typically shows genuine interest in your thoughts and feelings. This can help you understand his character and compatibility with you.

Background Check

Perform a background check if you feel comfortable. Do a quick online search to see if there are any concerning reports about him. Social media profiles can provide insights into his life and social circle. However, remember that online presence is just one part of the puzzle.

Talk About Relationships

Discuss his relationships with family and friends. How he talks about them can reveal a lot about his character. A good person will often have positive and supportive relationships.

Trust Your Instincts

Pay attention to your gut feelings. If something feels off, it’s worth exploring those feelings further. Your instincts can provide valuable insights into the person’s intentions and character.

Take Your Time

Don’t rush into anything. Spend time getting to know him before meeting in person or sharing personal information. Building trust and understanding through time is essential.

Meet in Public

Choose a public place for your first meeting. Meeting in public adds a layer of safety. Let someone know where you are going to feel even more secure.

Look for Red Flags

Be cautious of excessive flattery, manipulation, or attempts to isolate you from friends and family. These can be signs of unhealthy behavior and a lack of respect for your boundaries.

Seek Opinions

If you have mutual friends or connections, consider asking them about him. They may provide valuable insights that you may not have seen on your own.

By following these steps, you can get a better sense of whether the person you’re talking to online is genuinely good and trustworthy. However, it's important to recognize that the online persona you encounter may not accurately represent the person. This is a common experience in the world of online dating. The first ten seconds in person may not tell the whole story. Ten minutes can provide a novel, and the rest might be a series of books with many chapters.

Only you can determine if someone is 'good' for you based on your standards of ethics and moral compatibility. The reality behind the fantasy can be quite sobering. So, be observant, stay aware, and enjoy the process of getting to know him if things continue to check out.

Remember, in my experience, the image we present online can be misleading. Many people who have great photos and engaging online personas may not be stellar in person and might make questionable decisions. They are just easy on the eyes and fun to bar-hop with on occasion. They fit the function of my needs at that time, and they know it. It’s our dynamic.

The first ten seconds with them in-person can tell a story. Ten minutes can tell a novel. The rest can be a series of books with many chapters. Good luck with your journey to find someone who is not just good, but also a perfect fit for you.